I often encounter people who assume that God sees them as worthless throwaways, deserving to be cast into the nearest hellfire, or punished by His awesome wrath. The truth is, God doesn’t see you or anyone else that way. He sees you as His beloved creation, with whom He desires to spend eternity.

I also encounter people who, because they have a faulty perception of God, continually strive to have enough, do enough, or be good enough to gain God’s approval. But God does not evaluate anyone on the basis of things external or behavioral. God doesn’t see you or any other person through the lens of a bank account, a family tree, a job, or a set of accomplishments.

Learning to see ourselves as God sees us is key to getting our spiritual identity in focus!

The very essence of self-discovery is seeing yourself apart from all other relationships and responsibilities. The “core you” is the you that exists even if you aren’t somebody’s parent, child, spouse, employer or employee, pastor, friend, or so-forth. If you truly want to discover your self-identity, you need to see yourself as you are by yourself.

As you seek to discover who God says that you are, you will benefit greatly from retreating to a place where you can be alone with God. It may be just for a night, for a weekend, or even longer. I know a woman whose husband left her for another woman. After dealing with practical matters, she asked her parent to take her children for a few days, and flew to one of her favorite places – a beach where she had spent happy days in her childhood. There she spent time alone, taking long walks and talking to God.

She told me, “I discovered myself again on those walks. I saw the ebb and flow of life as the waves lapped up on that beach, and how the ocean washed the beach clean at high tide. I asked God to wash my life in that way, and not allow me to clutter it up again with bad choices and decisions. I came away with renewed hope, energy, and a much clearer perspective.”

What this woman experienced is what many people experience when they get away by themselves. I have a personal retreat where I go to be alone with God. It’s where I do my best Bible study and where I have prepared some of my most effective sermons. I don’t spend prolonged periods there, but I do spend the time I need, so that I am able to keep a clear focus on who I am as an individual in God, and to gain rest and restoration needed for the busy, complicated life I lead.

When we know who we are individually in God, we are able to express ourselves in new ways, able to connect at deeper levels, and to strengthen our love for the people in our lives.

Getting alone with God is not an escape. Getting alone with God is a way to confront what we need to confront -- so we can grow!