But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you
—Matthew 6:33

If you are searching for the perfect mate package with your name on it, you may be surprised to discover that the Word of God has a lot to say on the subject of dating, courtship, and finding Mr. or Ms. Right. And if you are anxious or in a frenzy or frustrated about being married, you may have already started to look in the wrong places.

You don't want a spouse who isn't God's will for you. What are you looking for? God has a good plan for your life. Tall, dark, and handsome. Blonde, blue eyes, and beautiful. Please hear me on this: stop looking at the outside (the packaging)! Good looks don't come with a warranty for success and happiness!

This is how you're going to find your mate: "Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart" (Psalm 37:4). You have to start by working on your desires. When you delight in God, He's going to make your desires pure. He knows what you need much better than you do.

You have to stop seeking the idea of the person you want as a mate—and seek God. He has the perfect companion for you, and He'll bring that person to you if you will be patient and delight yourself in Him. Whether or not it seems you've waited for a long time, it doesn't take God years and years to get someone to you. He may bring your mate into your life today if you are sufficiently prepared to receive him or her.

When God is in a relationship, you know it. If you're a committed Christian, you'll also know it when God isn't involved. That girl or guy may look fabulous on the outside, but if they're full of vinegar on the inside, any happiness you thought you'd found with this person will quickly subside.

Take an inventory of your relationships. Sort through and relinquish the unhealthy ones that diminish you in any way. Fantasyland already has too many residents. God specifically instructed in His Word that Christians are not to even date unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14). Christians have no business going out with someone who is not a believer. If you are, you need to cut that relationship off today!

If you will focus on God and His plan and trust Him to bring your life partner to you in His perfect timing, you'll spend the rest of your lives together being grateful for the fruit of patience and the gift of wisdom.

Related Texts: Psalm 119:63; Proverbs 13:20; 22:24–25; Amos 3:3; Mathew 19:6; 1 Corinthians 7; Hebrews 13:4